I don't think brook has ever known best
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Randomize
