She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize