oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Can i not drive my cunt home
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Im in his room watching him sleep. Im going to try and jerk off and not get caught by the nurse.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
