I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Randomize
