Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
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