He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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