At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
Randomize
