your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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