So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
