She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Randomize
