just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
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