umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Watching her eat just hurts me
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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