i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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