when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
