just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize