And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
