Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
Put on my pants to go to work and discovered they had melted.
Randomize
