I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Randomize
