Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
