i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
