i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
