I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize
