she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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