Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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