so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize