i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I never thought the most recent texts on my phone would be with ASAP ferg and my ex...
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Randomize