You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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