is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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