Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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