Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I supernannyed him into submission
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize