i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Randomize
