ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
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