I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
