Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Randomize