What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Let the clothes fall where they may.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Randomize
