I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
True but thats because hes a fetus.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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