I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
she told me i tasted like america
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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