Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
im just going to make a prayer circle of top ramen packets and cheap beer
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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