ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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