I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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