Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize