if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
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