I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
Randomize
