it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
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