I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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