I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Randomize
