He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
