Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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