Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Randomize
