i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Randomize
