It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
