I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
