well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Yep. I'm going to buy a sex toy and a LARP prop on the same trip. Welcome to my life.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Randomize
