Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
